Shake It Out
by xxHaleinaxx
Summary: Songfic, ToothlessxHiccup : All of his questions, such a mournful sound. Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground


**AN: **After reading "The Hunger Games" (recommend it) I wanted to try my hand at first person perspective. Written not very well, but decided to share this with you guys :)

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><p>As I run, I have to keep reminding myself, and my tired feet, as to why I am running.<p>

I loved my brother more than I should have. Well, he's not really my brother. And maybe, that makes it a little bit more okay.

I am an adopted son. Mother told me once that she found me outside the village, wrapped in a blanket with a note inside.

"He is half dragon. His mother rejected him."

Mother had run back home with me safely in her arms. She was a creature of kindness, mother was. It was impossible for Father to say "no" to her, and so they kept me. They had raised me as their son.

I don't remember mother's stomach becoming rounder, but I was old enough to remember the screams of labor. Her cries had terrified me, but my father reassured me that everything was going to be okay. My mother was strong.

But, my brother was not. He was born too early, and in the cold of winter. That night, I overheard the medicine woman tell my father that he was probably going to die. I don't know why, but this had made me really sad.

That same night, I prayed to every god and goddess I knew to allow my brother to live. They must have heard my prayers, because my brother had survived.

For the first few years of his life, I stood vigilant, because he was weak. He was my little brother, my little Hiccup, and I was in charge of protecting him.

The night mother died, I held him so very tight. I could smell the death and hear the sorrow, but I didn't want Hiccup to know what was happening. I sung him a lullaby to drown out the dragon calls, but even as a small child, he was much too clever.

"You're scared too." His soft, little voice had reached me. "Don't worry, I'll protect you too."

Hiccup, although so very young, had not cried during Mother's funeral. I was weak, I had cried, but it was only because my brother allowed me to. That was the key to our relationship. One would be strong while the other was allowed to be weak.

As children, we were teased and ostracized. It was okay, though. We were so close, we didn't need anyone else.

Adolescence came too soon, and although I was older than my Hiccup, I didn't reach that dangerous stage until he did. I should have known that was a sign I was different. I should have…

We fell in love. He fell in love with the pretty blonde girl who never seemed to have a bad word on her lips. I fell in love with a much more dangerous predator.

The night I realized I had such perverted feelings for my little brother, was the night I transformed into a monster. My skin stretched, my bones shifted, and I reflected the beast that was inside of me. Hiccup saw everything. Of course he saw everything. He wouldn't leave me as I cried out in pain.

I didn't want to see the look of hate on his perfect face. I didn't want to see those vibrant eyes fill with fear. I had already seen too many faces with that look, and I was damned if I were to see one more.

I run until I can't run anymore. My paws are too tired, so I am forced to hide in some bushes that barely cover my new form. I hope that I ran so far that no one will find me. The Vikings are so fearful of dragons, I know they would kill me if they found me. I close my eyes and will myself back into my normal shape. Nothing happens.

After an eternity of wanting my body back, I hear a soft voice. It couldn't be…

I smell the air around me. I always had an extraordinary nose, and I could make out the smells of individual people. Blood, very little, but enough to block everything else. I can't smell the person approaching me. I'm fearful, but even so, the voice is soothing.

_"And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
>I can never leave the past behind." <em>

I know the song. I wish I could place where I heard it before, but the blood floods my scenes and makes my mind feel hazy. Oh, the voice is so beautiful.

_"I can see no way, I can see no way  
>I'm always dragging that horse around"<em>

I know that voice! Hiccup, my beautiful Hiccup, do I dare hope that it is you who is trying to find me? Will you try to end me life? No, you wouldn't. Your voice reassures me that I am safe.

_"All of his questions, such a mournful sound  
>Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground"<em>

I escape the sanctuary of the bushes, and use my new eyes to find my Hiccup. I hear his soft, slow steps approaching me from my right. I look. There he is, slowly making his way to me. The sleeve of his shirt is torn, and dried blood marred his otherwise perfect skin. He is injured, but he stays strong.

_"So I like to keep my issues strong  
>But it's always darkest before the dawn"<em>

I remember this song. It was the song we created together. We would sing it as children when we felt sad or lonely. Oh, I wish I could sing it with you, Hiccup, but I lost my voice. Even so, I fantasize singing this song with you again.

_"Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah  
>Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah"<em>

I approach him, slow and disarming. As I walk, I feel strange. It almost feels like I am transforming without the pain. I feel like water, fluidly changing shape to its container. I can feel my lips move to the melody of our song.

_"It's hard to dance with the devil on your back  
>So shake him off." <em>

Hiccup runs into my human arms, and I feel whole again. I am no longer weak. We are both strong. Tears are escaping both our eyes.

"Why did you run, Toothless?" Hiccup asks with a combination of desperation and confusion. He holds onto me tighter. He clings to me like he used to when he was a child.

"I didn't want you to hate me." I say softly as I return the intensity of his embrace.

"Why?" he laughs softly through the tears, "Why would I hate you? I-I love you."

"But," I have to stop myself from choking on my words, "But, I'm a dragon. Aren't you scared?"

"I'm scared only because of what the villagers would think." Hiccup sobs. I can feel his fear in the way he is shivering in my arms. I want to comfort him, but I know I can't. Reality wouldn't let us forget about what I am. "But, I couldn't stop loving you even if you were a dragon."

He shifts in my arms, and I look down to see what he is doing. Suddenly, his lips are on mine. I stifle my gasp. I don't want the sudden sound to startle him away. Instead, I kiss him back with all the intensity that my inexperienced self could muster. This kiss, this first kiss, was one that I never wanted to forget.

The kiss ends too quickly, and I have to stop myself from crying.

Hiccup buries his head into my shoulder. He's trembling. "Now," he laughs with little humor, "I'm afraid you hate me."

I step back, and Hiccup's eyes fill with fear. I remedy that fear with a kiss. I'm still inexperienced, we both are, and we stumble through this kiss. It was fine, though. In the sanctuary of the forest, we have plenty of time to practice.


End file.
